By: The Division of Communication & Advancement

The recent #RURises GBV Workshop hosted by the Office of Equity & Institutional Culture in collaboration with Not In My Name International highlighted the intricate and essential process of unlearning as a cornerstone for effective leadership and community transformation. This workshop aligned with the Student Representative Council's Leadership Week from 5 - 9 August 2024. Addressing gender-based violence (GBV) requires a multifaceted approach that challenges not only existing behaviours but also redefines societal norms, particularly around masculinity.

Unlearning entrenched behaviours is a formidable task for leaders aiming to instigate change. It demands a deliberate effort to discard harmful practices and beliefs that have long been accepted. This process is crucial for creating a ripple effect of demonstrable and measurable change within communities. Leaders must leverage their influence to foster environments that reject GBV and embrace equality. Lwazi Mdakane, currently studying for a Bachelor of Social Science in Politics and Philosophy, shared, "From the workshop, I learnt that change is hard, and you should expect backlash from people because this is how people have lived. As a man advocating for what should be done, which is morally right, it's hard because most men have lived in a way that reinforces the idea that they are the strongest and leaders."

The workshop emphasised the need for a broader social justice mandate beyond GBV to encompass socio-economic issues. As microcosms of society, universities serve as critical arenas where these changes can take root. The behaviours and attitudes cultivated within academic settings often mirror those in broader society, underscoring the importance of progressive practices in these institutions.

Redefining Masculinities

According to Siyabulela Jentile, President of Not In My Name International, one of the most significant discussions centred on the redefinition of masculinities. He argued against the demonisation of men and instead advocated for conversations that promote positive masculinities. Recognising the diversity within masculinities is crucial:

• Homogenous masculinities: These are dominant and often adhere to traditional gender roles.
• Marginalised masculinities: These do not fit the traditional mould and include those who may reject conventional masculinity.
• Subordinate masculinities: Often associated with homosexual men who are subjugated within the hierarchy of masculinities.
• Complicit masculinities: These are men who, despite not engaging in harmful behaviours, do not call out the dysfunctional behaviour of others.

Mdakane, who resides in Hilltop 7 House and is a Transformation Representative, expressed a deep connection to this theme. He shared, "I also wanted to be a Transformation Rep to try and change my life because I saw the environment I grew up in, and it's not what I want my brothers and sisters to have the same mentality." He further noted that unlearning societal expectations, especially those imposed on men, was a critical part of his journey: "Mostly what I want to do is try and unlearn what society has placed on how men should act, especially when it comes to men crying because it's said that indoda ayikhali."

Jentile defines patriarchy as "a system of social stratification based on gender that inherently favours men over women." This system leads to the policing of women's behaviours, dictating how they dress, speak, conduct themselves, etc. He highlighted the importance of addressing these systemic issues to dismantle patriarchal structures. Mdakane reflected on his academic learnings, noting, "I've also learnt in my first year that women were the ones who have power. This was African politics. I learnt a lot from African politics and had to unlearn what I had learnt from society about women."

A critical component of the workshop was addressing the bystander effect, where individuals passively observe injustices without intervening. The call to action was clear: "Society can no longer afford to stand on the sidelines. Everyone has a role in preventing the deterioration of social fabric by actively participating in creating change," said Jentile. Mdakane also touched on the societal blind spots regarding sexual violence, sharing, "Most of the time when we talk about women being raped, nothing is said, but when it's men, it's a different story because some of my friends think that men can't be raped."

Social Learning Theory and Re-socialisation

Re-socialising men to take responsibility for their actions is vital. The justice system, often not correctional, does not encourage unlearning. Instead, it breeds hardened criminals. A balanced approach that includes calling out behaviours while providing pathways for rehabilitation is crucial. The workshop raised critical questions about societal norms, such as the acceptance of "boys will be boys" attitudes and the phenomenon of "Pick-Meism" among women who defend men’s inappropriate behaviours. Constantly educating men and focusing on changing perpetrators' mindsets can help in mitigating GBV.

The involvement of men in GBV conversations is complex. While men must speak up, there is also a risk of overshadowing women's voices. Finding a balance where men can contribute without dominating the narrative is essential. The workshop concluded with a powerful message: true power lies in fostering positive everyday behaviours. "I learnt that there is a lot of inequality when it comes to men and women," Mdakane remarked. "A lot of women go through the most pain because of men and what they do to them."

The #RURises GBV Workshop with Not In My Name International provided a comprehensive framework for unlearning and transformation in the fight against GBV. By redefining masculinities, challenging patriarchal norms, and addressing the bystander effect, communities can make significant strides towards equality and justice. Leaders and individuals must embrace their roles in this transformation, fostering environments that reject GBV and promote positive change.